Cognitive Therapy for Children

The preparation of having a baby is overwhelming, buying bottles, diapers, clothes and setting up the nursery, it is life long preparations in a way because we learn from our own parents and how we were raised.
Throughout this process you will find yourself daydreaming about beautiful days spend with your child and playing with them, but put all those dreams on hold for now. Those thoughts you had are all lovely but real life is not so. Parenting skills is also a requirement in the preparation process, and you better make sure you have good ones.
Being a Parent
The moment conception happens, your extremely challenging but gratifying job as a parent begins. This job is not a job you can quit when you do not like it anymore. It is a life long experience that rides on a rollercoaster, with sky high thrills and heart breaking downhill’s all throughout the way. To assist your child in learning how to cope with life and the ups and downs to it, you will need your parenting skills to kick in and guide you on the right path. This path will also lead you to self comfort in those difficult situations you will face in the future with your children.
You can’t go to the store and buy parenting skills, you can’t download it form the internet in a neat package, this is something you must become skilled at and gain. In order to become the parent you desire to be, you must investigate, allow us to help guide you where to look and get your questions answered:
Knowing you own kid, we all are different, and have unique character aspects that identifies us to be ourselves. We discovered that most children will copy their parents, and desire to follow into their footsteps, but then again there are those who do not want to be like their parents and defy. The children that rebel against what you have been used to are the ones you will need good parenting skills with, they will upset you and leave you discouraged at times.
Rediscover your inner child, you need to step inside your children’s shoes and remember what it was like to be a child, this is called rediscovering your inner child. You tend to forget how to relax and then get stuck in a bored lifestyle and stressful jobs. The best way to understand the issues at hand with your children is to place yourself in their shoes, and see things from their own perspective; you will then gain an understanding for how they are feeling and why they are rebelling. Good parenting skills will teach you how to listen to your child’s demands and not relinquish to them, but how to stand strong and view the issue in your child’s eyes and come to a solution that pleases both of you.
Some things that you will learn with good parenting skills is when to allow your child to win and when to make sure she loses in the battles you will face. There will be times when you have to disapprove of your child’s actions or attitude, but you do not want to this in a way that it will traumatize the child. Too much criticism is not good for any parent/child relationship.
Interested? Keep Reading To Discover Where To Find Good Parenting Skills
Who better to find out how to solve your parenting issues than to talk to someone who has went through it before? Online nowadays there are forums available, some with chat option, to find others who are already experienced in those problems you think are impossible to overcome. There are thousands of websites about parenting or related to parenting and you can find nearly any type of situation possible. Look at how others ended their issues; what their solution was and see if that may work for you as well.
Naturally, all this information cannot be processed by our brains in a day, it will probably take you a lifetime of learning, suffering and rejoicing before it is successful. The important thing to keep in mind is to never give up, and as long as you are open minded you have won half the battle already.

Separation anxiety is actually very common in children under the age of three, and it’s normal for toddlers and young children to feel anxiety when a parent leaves the room. It’s also very common for young children to feel anxiety and cry when being left at day-care or school for the first time. For most children, this eventually passes as the children become engaged in new surroundings and activities.

The problem occurs, however, in about 4% of children when this separation anxiety does not subside and is, thus, classified as a disorder. Children with this type of disorder typically experience extreme anxiety when away from home and separated from mom and dad. This usually manifests via extreme homesickness and even misery, and such children often have intense fear regarding the health and safety of their parents.

As a result, such children will often:

- Try to avoid going anywhere by themselves.

- Refuse to go to places such as school or camp.

- Refuse to participate in sleepovers.

- Follow a parent around all the time.

- Request that mom or dad stay with them at bedtime, or show up in their parent’s bedroom during the night.

- Have nightmares about being separated from loved ones.

Closely related to separation anxiety disorder is social anxiety disorder, or “social phobia.” This disorder involves an intense fear of social and performance situations, such as starting a conversation, performing in front of others, speaking up in class, participating in peer activities, etc.

As a result, children with social phobias tend to withdraw and avoid such activities, which in turn greatly diminishes the quality of their lives. It can also hinder their performance and attendance in school, and impair their ability to form necessary social skills and relationships. Research has also shown that, if left untreated, children with such anxiety disorders are more vulnerable to substance abuse, depression and comorbidity (two disorders or conditions that appear together).

So, what should parents watch for and what should they do if they suspect an actual phobia or disorder? Part of the problem, of course, is that young children are often shy, and even adults can have anxiety about performing in front of others. Signs to watch for include:

- Reluctance or discomfort being in the spotlight.

- Avoiding eye contact.

- Speaking in a very quiet voice or mumbling.

- Avoiding conversations with peers, never inviting friends to get together, never ordering food in restaurants.

- Being isolated from groups, not participating in group activities.

- Being overly concerned and affected by negative feedback or embarrassment.

- Fear of being called on in class, reading aloud or public speaking.

When put into these situations, children with social anxiety disorder will typically have symptoms such as:

- Racing heart

- Sweating

- Dizziness

- Stomachache

- Crying

- Tantrums

For parents of younger children, experts advise the following tips to help children overcome or cope with social anxiety disorder:

- Don’t speak for your child, but encourage the child to speak up, order his/her own food, etc.

- Encourage children to get involved in birthday parties, play groups, school activities, family gatherings, games, activities, etc.

- Reward and praise children for speaking up, starting conversations, etc.

- Role model the desired social behavior.

For older children, as is the case with the mother and her son who’s away at school, panic disorder is a more intense form of social anxiety disorder. It is not very common in young children, but usually begins in adolescence and in the early to mid-twenties.

People with this disorder have “panic attacks,” which are abrupt episodes of intense fear or discomfort and usually include at least four of the following:

- Palpitations

- Sweating

- Trembling

- Hot flushes or chills

- Tingling sensations

- The need to escape

- A feeling of imminent danger or doom

- Shortness of breath/feeling of choking

- Nausea or stomach discomfort

- Chest pain or discomfort

- Lightheadedness or dizziness

- Fear of losing control or “going crazy”

If children, or adults, have had such panic attacks, they will typically avoid situations where they have had previous attacks. When children and adults begin avoiding public places (places from which escape might be difficult), “agoraphobia” can develop, severely hindering normal participation in situations such as school, work and life.

The bad news is that, because the symptoms of such disorders often mimic conditions such as heart attacks, thyroid and breathing problems, the true disorder is often difficult to diagnose. People who suffer panic attacks often make numerous trips to the doctor or emergency room.

The good news is that, once properly diagnosed, treatment can be highly effective. Therapists often use a combination of cognitive and behavior therapies, referred to as Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy (CBT), in which the patient is involved in his/her recovery, has a feeling of control, and learns skills that are useful throughout life.

Relaxation techniques – such as breathing retraining and exercise – are also used and help people with anxiety disorders to cope more effectively. Medications, including some antidepressants and anti-anxiety medications are often used in combination with the previously mentioned therapies. And, of course, the understanding and support of parents, family and friends can go a long way in helping people with anxiety disorders to cope and overcome them.